When it gets to this time of year, we begin to reflect on the past 12 months. We even start looking forward to the new year that is just around the corner. For us bloggers (even the ones like me who neglect their websites) it’s that time when we all start to think of things we wish to achieve in the year to come. But first let’s take a look back on twenty eighteen.
I would say twenty eighteen has been a year that changed me in so many ways. It’s a year that will forever be with me.
I started modelling properly this year, which has been such a confidence booster. I have never really liked the way I look, always picking out my flaws. Don’t get me wrong, I still fall subject to this, nit-picking at the things I can’t change about myself. However, I’m slowly learning how to love myself and modelling has been a huge factor in that. I was able to try a few different styles of shoots (lingerie, street, fashion and beauty). All of which have been a great experience, and I’m planning to experiment with other styles in 2019.
I had a few months where my Instagram game was strong, good following, content published daily and followed a theme. However, Instagram became such a difficult platform to grow on. I saw a decline in engagement on my blog page. Therefore, I started a new page for my modelling, now I’m not worried about engagement and I enjoy it so much more. I Dyed my hair multiple times this year. Was black then blue then I went purple and now I’m still purple. I also passed my first year at university with a 2.1 (it doesn’t mean anything, but I’m still proud of it).
I became the Eco Society President at university, something I am immensely proud of. For someone with social anxiety I’ve been holding society meetings, socials, arranging trips, activities and campaigns. To be honest, I never imagined that I would be able to do that. I learnt that anything was possible. If you truly believe in a cause then you could push yourself out of that comfort zone and achieve anything you want. From that, I was able to win ‘society of the month’ for the society with the most improvement. I think that my second year at university has been very career-driven and knowing what I want to achieve. It has pushed me out of my comfort zone, and therefore I was able to do all these things.
Twenty Eighteen saw my relationship hit the five year mark. Crazy how looking back on it, I was only 16 when my boyfriend and I started. Yet here we are today, five years later celebrating our relationship and all that we have both gone through, especially this year. We went on our first holiday together to Rome to celebrate the milestone. It was such a great trip for us both, that I think both of us fell in love with the city and wish to go back one day. Twenty Eighteen was a year that truly cemented our relationship. Having experienced a curve ball, something that was scary this year and reaching half a decade together, we are in a good place right now. I guess now I’m just waiting for the next step 😉 haha, jokes.
Twenty Eighteen has been a year of knowing there is so much I want to achieve, things I want to do, it’s been rather overwhelming. Especially in terms on uni work, I’ve been so focused on improving my grades, doing work experience and volunteering, to bump up my employability. So I’ve had less time to spend writing on this website. I don’t usually say it but there doesn’t seem to be enough hours in the day to do everything. Which is why I have kind of neglected my blog in recent months.
I have also spent time, well wasting spare time on Facebook, just strolling through my newsfeed. I see so many old high school ‘friends’ having children, moving into their own houses and getting new jobs whilst I’m still here at uni living with students and struggling to budget for a tin of beans. Adulthood is bloody scary, I know I’m only 21 and I will be able to have my own place, good job and everything else one day. It just seems like it’s taking me ages to get there. But I have big plans for myself and I know I will get there one day, especially now I’m so much more driven.
Plans don’t make themselves, you have to push yourself in the right direction. For me, I need to remember that everyone reaches their goals at different stages, and that my journey is my own. I shouldn’t compare myself to others. If I ever want to achieve all that I want, I need to balance everything and set goals that are measurable, sometimes that’s why a new year is a good thing. It’s a time to write a new chapter in your life. To change your direction and start achieving everything you wish to achieve.
Next year, I need to continue to practice self-love, improve on my confidence and continue to do well in uni. But I need to learn the difference between putting pressure on achieving goals and putting too much pressure on myself which could hinder me achieving the goals I set out. Therefore, next year, I will become a better version of myself. To truly embrace everything I want to be and not to worry about anyone else.